|
[01 Jun 2009|12:53am] |
|
WHAT!?
|
|
| Mansion in the sky |
[19 Jan 2009|02:54am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 Dirty Sanchez |
] |
Did you bitches think I was dead?
I'm quite the opposite.
I've neglected this thing like Sarah Palin towards women's rights. But I digress ....
Shit has chaned in my life and I won't go into detail because it's boring and I hate reading it on everyone else's journal so therefore I shall not induge myself. Anyway ... look for my talk show this comming fall season. Check your local ABC listings for "The Joseph Herpers Experience". In closing I need a cocktail ... like 7 of them in a row.....right now. Cheers,
Suck it.
|
|
| Spotlight |
[11 Aug 2008|01:05am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 gas |
] |
Let's see let's see.....
Well I've lost 81 pounds so far and I feel wonderful.
I have a new credit card and i'm fighting the temptation to charge things with it everyday!!!!!!!
Also I realized I could never be an AA sponser. I'd get a call at 2 in the morning from some hypersexual chick calling me crying "I want a drink!" I'd be like "I HAVE ONE, COME OVER!!!!!!!!!!! COME TO JO-JO WHERE IT'S NICE AND WARM AND SAFE". Needless to say I'd get fired immediatly.
Wayne of State return is happening very very fast.
Better get my Vasaline and shank ready for the good times.
Also ... Next time I get invited to a "game night", unless we're playing "who hid the coccaine" then I don't want to be bothered because that's my favorite game.
I hate romanitc comedy movies that make you feel like shit about yourself, because you know these things will never happen to you.
And there's 3 formulas that go along with romantic comedies because I've spent a lot of time hungover and my favorite things is when some bitch like J.lo is walking down the street and trips over something retarted like a leaf or something and then Matthew McConnogay comes and resues her.
When the fuck does that happen? I never see anyone trip in public but I always fall down and shit and no one help me. The only person who lifts my ass up is the bouncer cutting me off!
Have you ever noticed you never see and Ex when you look good.
Last time I saw an Ex it was 3 in the morning and I was at CVS rining out Gas-X and corn remover.
I was like "Hey! How you doing? These aren't for me they're for my grandmother who's visiting from out of town", to which she replies "Isn't she dead?" and then I scream while running out of the store "She came back and she's sick okay bitch!"
Oh God.
|
|
| WHO WANTS FREE SHIT FROM ME!? |
[21 Jun 2008|12:12am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 my contact fell out |
] |
IT'S THAT TIME OF YEAR .....
As usual I'm going to my vacation spot Gloucester, Mass.
And as usual I am taking requests for whoever wants a postcard from me?
Leave your info and I'll send you a surprise!
P.S. Gloucester was in the news recently because their local high school has 17 freshman girld who made a pact that they'll get pregnant around the same time ... AND THEY DID! These are 15 year olds getting pregnant ... 17 OF THEM!!!! ..... Now you understand why I go there every year... P.S.S. I am IN LOVE with this song "Bottle Action" by Miss B. "I don't fight /I Don't argue /I just hit that bitch with a bottle" .... STORY OF MY LIFE!
|
|
| Muppets |
[30 May 2008|01:01am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 watery eyes |
] |
I really hate high school baby drama ....
I was done with it 2 years ago .......
fucking deal with it.....
on a lighter note; I am LOVING my new Denny's spaceship child cup! It's the new pimp cup and it's was sexier and it only costs 2$. Get it or no one will sleep with you again.
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.1){kind=small}
bluebayou's journal